Quick Hits – Vol. 1

Sometimes you get an idea in your head and you want to share it, but there isn’t enough meat to write a whole article about it. I call it a quick hit, and I’ll try to throw them all together in a regular column here at intothegrain.com. I’ll present an idea or opinion, say a few things about it, and move on to the next topic. The idea is to get you readers out there thinking a bit and posting your comments in agreement or against my points. Let’s start volume one with a bang!

1. Tiger will retire at 40. With the news that Tiger Woods has just eclipsed the one billion dollar mark in career earnings, we all know he’s not playing for the money. Hell, that kind of money is earning him enough in interest to keep some small countries going! Once he beats Jack’s major record and Snead’s tournament wins record, why should he keep playing? Just because Tim Finchem wants him to?

2. Plum-bobbing doesn’t freakin work. Dave Pelz has proven it doesn’t, and even if Johnny Miller claims he learned from the guy who invented it, it doesn’t help you make any putts. By the way Johnny, the plum bob was invented by the ancient Egyptians, long before the world was blessed with your insightful commentary on Sundays. “Looks like a slight downhill. Whaddya think?” “And a slant to the left.” “That’s cause you’re only wearing one shoe.”

3. The FedEx Cup ranks right up there with college football’s BCS when it comes to sucking the life out of tournament golf. We’ve had the FedEx Cup for three years now, and every year they have changed the format. Every year the rules favor the “star” golfers like Tiger, because that’s who the powers that be want to see win. And why the hell do we have the playoffs before the end of the season? Last I checked, there were at least 5 more regular season PGA Tour events, the President’s Cup, the World Cup and the WGC event in China on the schedule.

4. The silly season events are the best on the calendar. Fans love to see their favorite players in a relaxed atmosphere and playing in different formats. Many golfers play weekend games with their buddies for skins, or play stablefords, nassaus and four-balls all the time, but not on the PGA Tour. Stroke play. Grind it out. Every. Week. Throw a few silly season events in the regular season to shake things up and break up the monotony! The fans love Ryder Cup, President’s Cup, match play, skins games, four-balls and stablefords, so why don’t you give the fans what they want Mr. Finchem?

5. Memo to club manufacturers: Just admit that you are running out of ideas already. We’ve become acustomed to a 6 month product cycle where new clubs are always coming out, and anyone wanting to keep up with the technology curve has to spend $400 on a new driver twice per season. While I love to see and hit all the new stuff and people love reading about it, it’s getting a big crazy. Why does the average golfer still shoot 100? If every new club and ball actually gave me 10 more yards, I would be hitting tee shots over 350 yards in the air by now. Not to pick on Adams or Nike, but the new aerodynamic shaped clubs designed to swing through the air faster have been done already. Taylor Made put dimples on their original burner drivers in the early 90s, and Wilson gave us the Invex Driver that Daly used to win the British Open. Nice try though. What will you think of next? Interchangeable faced wedges? Oh, wait.

6. Just like the toy companies re-release all their old product lines every 10 years to the next generation of kids, it seems like golf clothing manufacturers are doing the same. Thanks to companies like Tatoo Golf and Loudmouth Golf, we can wear golf duds that may spontaneously cause people to kick our asses. If those are too flashy for you, you can dress up in something from Ian Poulter Designs or J. Lindeberg. While not as provoking as Loudmouth or Tatoo, they are sure to garner looks from playing partners, especially if you have a waist size over 28, which most of these clothes are designed to fit. Hmm, where have I seen these pants before? Oh yeah – the 70s!

Please leave me a comment to let me know if you agreed of disagree, or just think I’m plain crazy. We’ll see you next time!